Long time no speak!

Whats happening people,

Today I was going through my blog, just checking recent posts (like say I dunno what I posted!) but na...just checkin over it to try and get an objective view like - if this was the first time I came to this blog, would I like it, would I get to know the artist bla bla.

My conclusion is...yea...its decent BUT I feel like all these video blogs are getting quite impersonal. I mean you see me in my element, day to day, at shows, in the studio, in my house etc which is as personal as it can get BUT at the same time, its like you are a fly on the wall...an outside observer. I want you to be part of my whole journey and so I thought Id write directly to YOU..the readers....or of late, watchers....

SO obviously, from the last couple video diaries (if you havent watched them, scroll below this post and do so), you can tell that ive been in the studio ALOT recently. I feel like a robot sometimes - doing this music between a 9 to 5 is madness if you really work as hard on music as you should.

Over the past couple weeks, ive been going straight from work, (9-5), to my house to get my mic, laptop and change if theres time, then to mc dees to get a munch on the way to the studio....till like 3 or 5 am....wake up 7:30 for work...then do it all again. Its sounds unbelievable but on a normal week, I sleep around 5 hours a night (dont ask why..im just not a big sleeper) so the sleep depreviation isnt anything new....its just that working round the clock takes it OUT of you to the point last friday, I got in from work just after 5pm and fell asleep straight away till like 11pm....on a FRIDAY NIGHT lol.

BUT this, I guess is whats necessary...you get in what you put in...so hopefully...I reap what im sowing soon - I go studio mostly with super producer TE1 who engineers for me but if he isnt around, I go by myself and sit with four walls (no windows), two speakers and carry on making my album. Its not an issue...its just that at the end of the day, no one is gonna work harder on your goals than you are...ive learnt to rely on the only person I can guarantee will NEVER let me down- myself. I know its good to be able to lean on others sometimes but if you want something done straight away..you do it yourself - real talk.

Thats why I taught myself how to produce, record, engineer, mix, master, play couple instruments, make my own websites, edit my own videos..and anything else I cant do, I will google, learn, and do - you lot should know I love some google - lol - im reading it back and it sounds like im upset with someone- its not that at all...its more....ok...I stopped going to the Gym a while back (dont worry, keep reading it will make sense) because the person I went Gym with always had a conflicting timetable and for some reason, I dont like going Gym by myself....proper gym goers go to the Gym by themselves because at the end of the day, its there body...no one elses...and it looking good is the motivation as opposed to a gym buddy motivating and so you go, you workout, and come home - gym buddy or no gym buddy - thats the attitude I take to music....at the end of the day, its my music....and it sounding good is the motivation...studio buddy or no studio buddy....hope that makes sense...anyway..

When I started this crazy studio schedule, I decided to put a hold on doing shows too as the preparation, rehersals and all that kind of thing takes me out of studio mode and I cant really do alot of performances and have a constant studio timetable at the same time...one will suffer. So after the summer spurt...I decided to fall back. I did get asked by Bang Radio to do a performance and be on a panel of judges for a young peoples event they are planning for mid October which I couldnt say no too and I also had a show to do at PLAN B in brixton on the 5th November but I agreed to that ages ago so watch out for more info on those.

I guess thats the update for now...think ive gone on way too much. I hope you lot are good.

Thanks for reading.

'Cisive

P.s - a random side thought...who knows your passwords? I mean its a random question but touch wood - if anything were to happen to you, is there someone that you trust enough to have given your passwords for your laptop, facebook, email, your blackberry, your bank card etc? I say that because im just about finished my album...but if anything happens to me, will no one knowing the laptop password lock the album away for ever? or if someone wanted to let people know something happened to me, does anyone know my blackberry password? Just a side thought...I know the answer for me....whats your answer? comment...